With regard to the statement "all that matters is a healthy baby", I have one additional thought. If that is true, and all that matters is a healthy baby, then why is it that mom's who are the most emotionally dissatisfied with their birth experiences have had bad ones, but maintained long term good outcomes? In fact, a bad birth experience can lead to post partum depression. You can't convince me that the long term health of the baby is the only thing that matters.

As a mom and a nurse attending deliveries I've heard that expression a lot with regard to birth experiences. So it occurred to me that there is some variation on the definition of a healthy baby, or a good outcome of a labour and delivery. So the question is, what is a "good outcome" to you? Is the definition of a good outcome simply bringing the baby home, ultimately healthy? Or do you want to optimize that outcome?

Here are some examples:

Is it a good enough outcome to have the baby require separation from you, have deep suctioning immediately after birth, and possibly oxygen, including bagged breaths, and stimulation (typically fairly rough back rubbing along the spine, as that's what the national standard for rescucitation teaches all docs and nurses to do for stimulation), but ultimately room in with you? Is that a good outcome?

Is it a good enough outcome to have the baby start out with respiratory distress and have to transition in the NICU? Maybe it has to stay a day or two for a sepsis workup, because of the risk of pneumonia - this would require a spinal tap - but it comes home with you after a few days? Is that a good outcome?

How about real pneumonia? Then the baby is in the NICU for a week minimum getting antibiotics and oxygen therapy... but it'll come home at some point down the road, just not with you. It IS ultimately healthy, though. Is THAT a good outcome?

How about persistant pulmonary hypertension? In this scenario because of the lack of cues indicating birth, baby doesn't transition well and ends up with high pressure in the lungs and low pressure in the body, and blood continues to bypass the lungs and not oxygenate, and baby requires intubation, vasopressors, antibiotics, and may be critical for some many days (even so far as to go on ECMO - basically lung bypass, like in surgery), but ultimately gets better and goes home. Is THAT a good outcome?

See, to me, the goal isn't about the lesser of the evils (oh, I'll take the transient respiratory issues and rough early moments after birth rather than the potential for meconium, or stuck baby, in the case of electing for a C-section), it's about optimizing the outcomes so that NONE of those are high risk. Homebirth, or non-interventive birth, does that... I want my baby on my chest, I want her to get there gently, with no tugging on her head, I want her to nurse as soon as she's ready (not have to wait for hospital policies on bringing her back OUT to me, for example), and I want her to never leave my side.

THAT, to me, is a good outcome... and very little less will leave me completely satisfied, unless I know that the interventions we have are required medically.

And yes, I've seen all the above mentioned secenarios.

Chloe's almost 6 months old, and I recently was describing to someone our EC progress, so I thought I'd post it here.

At this point, Chloe knows to use the potty, and does almost every time she's on it. She sometimes can hold it, but not always, so if I don't respond to her cues (it's one of her fussy sounds) and get her on pretty quickly, or anticipate that it's "that time" and put her on, she'll use the diaper. We catch 95% of her poops, and probably 75% of her pees on a regular basis. When she's sick, or out of sorts, or we travel etc etc, she can backtrack (so can a toddler, though, that's not unusual), but she gets back on track pretty quickly, within a few days. There are also times that she doesn't want to use the potty, and I don't force her, last thing this should be is a battle.

I've noticed that she also senses the changes in the house around the weekend versus the week with her siblings being around more or less, and that Saturdays and Mondays are her "worst" days for EC, and Wed-Fri are her "best" days. Occasionaly we can go entirely without having to change a diaper on those days! Sundays and Tuesdays are "in between" days.

We've just started using the sign for potty when we put her on it, and the sign for all done when she's done. For now, she starts squirming when she's done - so she definitely has her way of telling us. It's not called Elimination Communication for nothing. She definitely communicates with us what she needs, we just have to learn to make sure we're listening.

and wears disco pants. At least that's so according to Phoebe's latest school journal entry.

My personal religious philosophies are all about Mother Nature, and the god-ness in all the people around us as exhibited in good deeds and kindness. My sanctuary can only be reached by climbing onto a bike. It's comprised of open spaces and the beauty of the earth, and the safety I feel in that. I believe in God, a higher power through which all things can be traced. I chat with him or her on my solo bike rides and through that I find a sense of peace, and sometimes some bonus wisdom - so I guess you could call that prayer.

My daughters join my mother in the encapsulated sanctuary of the Presbyterian church on Sunday mornings. I'm glad that they're getting this education, and that they have the opportunity to explore religion. Of the organized Christian denominations, Presbyterianism is one that is progressive and accepting, and I'm happy to have them go to that particular church. At the same time I also try to make it clear to them that it is just one of many belief systems. They're a little young to gain that understanding yet, but my goal is to make sure that they choose their OWN theology as they grow and explore their beliefs. I'm thankful for some base introductory Judaism in their lives, and hope to teach them more about it, as well as Islam, Buddhism, Hinduism and any others that should come up.

The choice to explore these religions further will be theirs. In the meantime, Phoebe happily believes in God, and is curious about this being who has curly hair and wears Disco pants.

Yes, I'm supporting a friend in posting this, but it's STILL an awesome toy! We own both and have given them away as gifts as well.

So for those of you interested in wooden toys, and/or airplanes, check out Butterwheels at Palo Alto Toy and Sport online. I'm telling you they are SO cool!